This is part two of a three part series on Patricia and her decision to have tubal ligation reversal. Part one is Tubal Ligation Reversal at 46: Patricia’s Story.
Patricia’s Reasons for Tubal Ligation Reversal
Twenty-two years ago, I was talked into getting my tubes tied after the birth of my third child. I was led to believe my life would be threatened if I had another baby, so I agreed to it. I am now 46 years old and remarried to a man who has never had a child. When he asked if it were possible for us to have a baby, my first reaction was no – I am too old. But after thinking about it, I decided to check into my options. I went to a specialist to have tests and be examined to see if my tubal ligation could be reversed. I also wanted to know if it was safe for me to have another baby. My husband also had his sperm count checked to make sure he was in good condition.
Physically, I discovered I could have the tubal reversal done and try to have a baby. Emotionally, we were torn with the decision. My husband feared we would have a baby with Down syndrome, or we would go through the expense and not be able to conceive. I had thoughts of how old I would be when the child reached school age, teenage years, and adulthood. I worried I would not be as active with this child as I was with my first three. My family told me I was crazy for wanting another baby. And, I was afraid I was too old to get pregnant.
I am a very strong willed and determined woman. I raised my children by myself while putting myself through college to receive a psychology degree. I created a new ‘X’ shaped ball called Yackle Ball to help children and adults who struggle with traditional balls. When others said I was trying to achieve the impossible by bringing my own product to the market I did not listen. I have always believed I could achieve anything I put my mind to. Having a baby at 47 years old is another challenge of my character and strength.
My husband and I have been back and forth for the last five years about having a baby. When he finally came to me and said he wanted to have my baby, I did not hesitate. I threw my arms around him and shouted ‘YES! Lets do it!’ I called right away to set the appointment. Making the appointment was easy, but then I needed to calm our fears.
Research About Age and Tubal Reversal
• First, I researched how many women have had babies after the age of forty and found there were a lot. There are many blogs online where I read stories and learned what other women my age have gone through and what dangers there may be.
• Second, I checked with my doctor about my chances of having a child with Downs, and the doctor assured me tests could be done early in pregnancy and could detect Down syndrome. As for my chances of conceiving, I have come to the conclusion: no one really knows for sure if they will ever become pregnant when they begin trying. I have to put myself in God’s hands and trust that having a child is a miracle we will be blessed with. The age thing was a little more difficult to come to terms with.
• Third, I started speaking with women who had remarried and had children later in their lives and they all seemed to work everything out. Their response is if you really want the child, then you can make the changes to your lifestyle to make it work. As for my family, I know they love me and once they hold that precious baby in their arms they will be happy for me.
Gaining as much knowledge as possible is the best advice I can give. If you have doubts or questions, find the answers. If you have fears then find out if they are realistic and what you can do about them. There are many people out there who have gone through having a child later in life and can let us know what to expect.
Thoughts about A Personal Choice
I am glad I choose A Personal Choice. They have made me feel comfortable, answered all my questions, and have put my fears to rest. This was a huge decision for me, but I am happy that I have made the choice to have a baby with my husband. I feel confident we will have a happy, healthy baby and we will be able to offer this baby a wonderful life.
Readers can see Patricia on the QVC channel
Patrica will be demonstrating her new product on a segment of the QVC Channel called ‘Nifty Gifts’. This will be a live broadcast on December 10th, 2008 between the hours of 9-11AM. Patricia will be having her reversal surgery the day after her live broadcast- so wish her well. We also welcome readers to leave comments for Patricia and Charles on this blog or on the Tubal Reversal Message Board.
Note: This is part two of a three part series on Patricia and her decision to have tubal ligation reversal. Part one is Tubal Ligation Reversal at 46: Patricia’s Story.