My Tubal Ligation – Then The Loss of My Son
My journey to Dr. Berger began on May 29, 2007, the day my youngest son, Jayden, was born. I knew in my heart I did not want my tubes tied, but because of 2 very life threatening pregnancies, we (me, my other half and doctor) decided it would be best to have a TL. But then life became all too real to me on July 30, 2007 when I lost my youngest son, only 2 months and 1 day after he was born. This picture of Jayden shows what a happy baby he was…
In the earliest part of my tubal reversal journey, I did not think I would want another baby, but as time passed, I did a lot of soul searching. When you lose a child, at any time in their life, a lot of guilt comes with your “new” life. Added to my guilt was that yearning, the desire of wanting another baby. It became painfully and almost obsessively clearer with time that having the TR would be such an important part of my healing journey.
I can never have my sweet Jayden back. He can never be replaced. He will always be my second born son, and will remain with me forever. But it would be such a blessing to have a chance of having another baby, and a piece of him… a gift from him… and a gift to him. He watches over his big brother, and if I ever were given the chance to have another baby, he will be able to have a younger sibling as well, another sibling to watch over and be proud of. I am extremely proud of both of my sons, and it is my every hope that Jayden will be excited about the idea of being an older sibling.
The Added Problem of PTLS
I would also like to say that, along with much emotional stress, my body physically went through a terrible amount of stress from the day I had the TL. I was constantly in pain, I suffered from what I believed to be PTLS, and though many people do not believe in it, I DO! I had more problems from the very day of the surgery that I never had, not one single day in my life, and I was searching for that relief as well.
How I Found Dr. Berger
It was amazing how I found Dr. Berger, and I was instantly drawn to him. I did what many people to and search around, mainly because my family made me… but I can not lie… when I saw Dr. Berger and his website, it was my own personal immediate decision: This is where I am going to go! Not a single doubt in my mind, I instantly knew it. The next part of my journey began, which was the financial issue, but a kiss in the wind was blown my way, and in February of 2009 I was able to schedule my surgery on May 21, 2009. Only 8 days before Jayden would have been 2. My oldest son had turned 3 only days before I scheduled my tubal reversal.
Submitted by Lisa R.
angeljdclilcake@aol.com
In Part 2 of My Journey to Tubal Reversal With Dr. Berger, posted on July 5th, Lisa R. writes, “On the day of my consult at A Personal Choice, I felt like I was in a whole new world. I have NEVER in my life felt so important or so special. When I met with Dr. Berger that day, I just knew I was in the best hands possible.”
More About Tubal Reversal Journey
“An Angel, in the book of life, wrote down our baby’s birth. Then whispered as she closed the book, too beautiful for Earth.”
-Unknown Author (currently searching)
“Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved.”
-Helen Keller
“It was written in the book before ever being born
Both heaven and earth would have to mourn.”
-ME
